Monday, January 9

How to Make a B&W Bday Cake

Or better known as the half chocolate, half vanilla sheet cake that you remember from every childhood birthday party ever. Just add sundae cups and a couple screaming toddlers!

My roommate recently turned old. So we turned back the clocks and tried to have an old school 5 year old birthday party. There were hats. 

There he is! How mature!
I probably would have had a lot more fun decorating this one if...iiiifff I was good at cake decorating... AT ALL. I should really probably take some classes. But I think I achieved my goal here! And used 6 sticks of butter in 1 baked good. I deserve at least a few high fives for that.

Soundtrack: Dancing + Cake... Yes.

Wax Your Tips by Business Casual Disco

Step 1: Make butter and sugar become friends.
Check to make sure you have eggs before this step, if you learn anything from me.


I made the vanilla cake first, but you could pick either.
Just bake in an 8x8 pan.

Poke some holes in it! Is it done? It smells done...

To dissolve cocoa powder in water, I usually boil the water,
then pour it in to the pyrex and dissolve the cocoa there.
You probably don't want to measure the water first, then boil...
Evaporation or some shit...

Ok, just another batter...

And another finished 8x8 cake.
Now... I know you're excited. But please let the both cool.
Frosting is made from butter. Melted frosting... just ew.

Make some more butter and sugar be friends.
Basically, just beat them until they get along.

Your tools...

Oh yea, and a bread knife.
Measure out the exact middle of each cake.
Yea, I said exact. You want the tops to match the bottoms.
Curtains... drapes.. what?

Now.. if 1 cake rises more than the other, it means you fail.
No, that's not true. We're all winners here.
It means you're going to have to shave. This metaphor just needs to end here.

2 parts to a whole!
Now you just match them up!
On a cake stand if you can find 1 at Target on sale for $5.

When you hide the cakes insides, try not to forget which side is which.
Yea. I did that.

Cheesy decoration is essential here.

The worse it actually looks the better!

Be careful with fire. Especially if you have been drinking.
Especially if you have been drinking enough to sleep on the couch the whole next day.

Don't bother with cutting the cake. Or utensils.
He's taking a big bite of life. Can't you see this picture OOZING with metaphor?
And there you have it! In a nutshell. How to waste more time than you ever thought possible.

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